The Heart's Desire
by SexleyWesley
Summary: Mona Vanderwaal isn't A anymore. But Hanna, the girl she's in love with, and Hanna's friends Aria, Spencer and Emily all believe she's still the infamous psychopath stalking them. What will it take for them to realize they're in it together, and for Hanna to love her like she loves her?
1. Chapter 1

"Hanna! I swear I'm not A anymore!" I cried. "Whatever, Mona!" she shouted as she stormed out.

I'm Mona Vanderwaal. Over the past year, I was living a double life as myself, popular girl at Rosewood High, and "A", the stalker of four pretty girls named Aria Montgomery, Hanna Marin, Emily Fields and Spencer Hastings. I'll admit, I'd done some pretty terrible things. The top of the list being running over Hanna Marin, who had been my best friend ever since Queen Bee Bitch, Alison DiLaurentis, disappeared two years ago. But, ever since she reunited with "The Others," a.k.a Aria, Emily and Spencer, I'd been dead-set on getting my revenge for the years they tormented me.

But, now there was a new A. And I was one of the girls who was being tortured. If only I could get Hanna convinced that I'm actually being tormented now too. The last A message I received was when we were at Wilden's funeral a few days ago. "The truth won't set you free. I'm gonna bury you with it. -A". Fucking psychopath. This bitch "Red Coat" is not going to get away with pinning Wilden's murder on any of us. I can promise the girls that at least.

"Hanna! I yelled as I chased after her. "You know I love you, Hanna! You're my best friend!" "Yeah right, Mona. You love me so much you had to hit me with your car? Leave us alone. We know you're still A!" I could practically taste the betrayal from the tone of her voice. "Hanna, I swear I'm not this A! But, I'm going to find out who is. And hopefully, I can get you girls to help me and convince you that I'm on YOUR SIDE. I'm now a "Pretty Little Liar" too. We're in this together!" I said. I felt like crying right now, but I hadn't been able to cry in years. It must have been whatever Dr. Sullivan said I had when she got me locked up in Radley. Adrenalized hyperreality or whatever? Just another detrimental thing Alison DiLaurentis had caused me over the years. "What are we supposed to do, Mona?! You THREATENED us for a whole year! And then you try and kill us at Thornhill when the lodge was caught on fire!" Hanna screamed. "I swear, that wasn't me, Hanna! I haven't done anything to you, recently!"

This exchange carried the same tone for about 10 minutes. No matter what I said, she would not believe me that I had not caused any of their problems recently. And I meant it. Deep inside me, I still had sinister feelings toward Alison, Hanna and the others, but I had started to realize that my feelings should only be directed at Alison. She was the cause of my pain, and nickname "Loser Mona" throughout her reign in Rosewood. "Hanna!" I yelled. "I swear I'm not the one doing this to you! I had a lot of time to think in Radley.. and I realized that I... I-I'm in love with you, Hanna." And then Hanna's boyfriend, Caleb, honked his car horn, glaring at me like I had just been released from the fires of hell.


	2. Chapter 2

"Caleb! How did you find me?" Hanna was pissed. Just another instance of Caleb following her around without her permission. He was like a stalker boyfriend. Why did she stay with him? "Yeah, Caleb," I said. "What exactly ARE you doing here? Because obviously, you're not just out for a drive." I rolled my eyes. Wait... did I just tell Hanna I was in love with her? _Oh my god_, I thought. I had to get out of here. "Hanna, I'll talk to you later." I said as I could feel the heat rising to my cheeks.

"I can't believe you just did that Mona," I whispered to myself in the car. "You told Hanna you were in love with her. Like she'll ever want you around now.." I knew what I had to do to prove myself to Hanna and the others. I had to find "Red Coat". No matter what, they'd realize I'm not on the A-team anymore if I tell them who is.

Where to start? The lair was gone, every place I'd gone would be a dead end, and the number was obviously untraceable. This A was even better than I was, if that was even possible. I'd only been unmasked because of that bitch, Spencer. I made one damn mistake with my gum, and BAM, "Congratulations, Spencer. You've finally figured it out." That night played in my head repeatedly while I was in Radley. _The Lost Woods Resort it is_, I thought as I started my car and drove off.

It was a short drive to the Lost Woods, and I'd remembered this route like the back of my hand. My "A" lair used to be up here, so I'd spent countless hours here. The path was very muddy, and untouched as if no one had been up here since that night. Hopefully the spare key for my old room was still in the lamp outside. "Way to go, Mona," I proclaimed, a little to loudly. Quickly, I clapped a hand over my mouth. The bushes were rustling and I could hear very discreet footsteps from behind them, so I ran inside. "Hello?" I whispered. The room was empty. Obviously, new "A" couldn't wait to get their hands on everything I had collected on the liars and Alison.

Hopefully, they had left something behind. That bitch was getting on my last nerve. "I will unmask you, Red Coat!" I yelled. Frantically, I remembered the footsteps and started searching. I checked everything and under everything. Nothing. What am I going to do now? I dropped to the floor. Is this what Aria, Spencer, Emily and Hanna had felt over the past two years? I couldn't believe I'd caused them this sort of stress. It was a game for me. They deserved it for letting Alison torment me and make my life a living hell. But could I blame them? Ali would have done the same to them, had they stood up to her. Only Spencer had the lady balls to do that, and that wasn't until the night she went missing. Spencer never had to feel her wrath.

Lost in thought, I suddenly heard rapid knocks on the door. What the hell? Who would be out here? Slowly, I inched towards the door. The knocks became faster and stronger after each step I took. The door started to creep open. _Shit_, I thought. I had forgotten to lock the damn door. As the figure stepped into the room, I stood up. I knew who it was.

"What the hell are you doing here, Spencer? Were you following me?"


	3. Chapter 3

"Seriously, Spencer, what the fuck are you doing here?" It had been five minutes since Spencer Hastings, one of the four girls I used to torment, had shown up at my old lair, unexpected and unannounced. She had just walked in and sat down, surprisingly not saying anything, and it was starting to drive me crazy.

"Spencer, if you're not going to say anything to me, I'm leaving!" I yelled. Still nothing. "I've had enough," I said as I started towards the door. "W-Wait, Mona, wait..." she whispered. Spencer cleared her throat, and I can tell she put on the best bitch face she had in her arsenal. "Are you A or not anymore, Mona?" she stood up and said with a flare. "I'm not, Spencer. I know why you don't believe me, but I swear, I'm not." How many times had I said this? At least someone was finally listening. As I finished my sentence, I could see her looking at me up and down, examining every part of me. "I believe you, Mona."

The next day

The bell rang as I was walking through the halls of Rosewood High. "Ms. Vanderwaal! Get to class!" a teacher shouted. I couldn't hide the contempt from my face. I had had it with this school, these teachers, and most of all, my peers. It wasn't as strong a feeling as it had been before Alison DiLaurentis went missing, and died, if she is actually dead. But, ever since Radley I wasn't Queen Bee Mona anymore. No one tried to please me, or get in my group. I understand why, I wouldn't want to be friends with the crazy girl if I was in their position either, but I wish they could see I'm better now.

"Hey, Hanna!" I yelled from across the hall. Damn she looked good. Her blonde hair braided, with a pink blouse, and tight skinny jeans that showed off her curves perfectly. She always had a spark for fashion, and knew exactly how to get a guy's attention.. and mine, apparently. "Hanna?" I yelled. But she didn't turn. She didn't even glance in my direction. She just kept walking, acting as if she hadn't heard anything. Before I knew realized what was happening, a tear streamed down my face. Was I crying? I must really be in love with this girl.

I had never thought about girls this way before. Did it just happen like this for some people, or was it just Hanna for me? I needed to figure this out before anyone found out, especially A. My reputation would be destroyed even further if people found out I was a lesbian stalker, who fell in love with one of my victims. What they didn't know was Hanna was the only one who didn't deserve it. The rest of those bitches did.

As I walked out of class, I felt all eyes on me. _Oh my god_, I thought. _What's going on? _This hasn't happened since Caleb put that brain in my locker. Slowly, I walked to my locker, half-expecting for someone to come up to me and ask me that dreaded question. But, then I saw it. The cops. Talking to the principal. "You remember she was the one who tormented Aria, Emily, Hanna and Spencer, right?" a girl whispered. "Duh, are they here for her? What's she do now?" another whispered back. I turned around, looked them in the eyes, and said, "Listen, bitch. Unless you want your life to be hell too, I suggest you shut your mouth and turn around, now. And make sure everyone hears from your gossip-filled mouth that I didn't do anything. Got it?" They nodded slowly, and averted their eyes. _That's what I thought_ was all that crossed my mind.

"22-14-9," I whisper as I was putting in my locker combination. As I got my books out of my bag, I saw a note drop to the floor. "Please don't be A, please don't be A," I chanted. Holding my iPhone as I bent over, I picked the note up.

"Keep searching for me, and I'll tell everyone about your love for Hefty Hanna. Kisses -A"


	4. Chapter 4

As I got my books out of my bag, I saw a note drop to the floor. "Please don't be A, please don't be A," I chanted. Holding my iPhone as I bent over, I picked the note up.

"Keep searching for me, and I'll tell everyone about your love for Hefty Hanna. Kisses -A"

Shit. I tried to forget A was after me too, but my efforts were proven futile, by the bitch shimself. _Buzz_. Was that my phone? I picked up my iPhone, and of course there was a text from A. Actually, it was a video. Fantically, I made my way to the bathroom, where I could turn my volume up. I clicked play, and watched the video. Of me. Fuck my life. It was a video of me telling Hanna I was in love with her. A really did ant to make my life a living hell, and knew just how to do it. I just hope I don't get sent back to Radley..

After school

"Mona, wait up!" Spencer shouted. I hadn't spoken to her since the other night at the Lost Woods Resort. What did she want now? "Can I help you, Spencer?" I snarled. "Actually, I think you can, Mona. I want to find out who A/Red coat is and you're going to help me." She growled. "Oh, I am, am I? Since when?" I rolled my eyes. Of course she wanted my help now. "Yes, you are. Or I'm going to tell everyone that you ran Hanna down with your car, and that you're in love with her." My mouth dropped. Of course Hanna would tell those bitches. "Blackmail. Classy, Spencer. Real classy." "Not like you've never done it to us." I smirked as she said this. She did have a point.

"Why are you in such a rush to find her now?" I asked. "Because the bitch has gone to far this time." she said as she held up her phone.

"Hey, Spence. You know what's gonna happen if you keep looking for me? Toby, Melissa and your parents will get hurt, and you will be powerless. As usual. Keep up your charade, or I make them pay. Xo, -A."

"So revenge, that's why your looking?" "What other motive is there, Mona?" We're going to find her. I won't stop until we do. Meet me in a few hours at my house. We'll leave from there."

Three hours later

"Where are we going, Spencer? I thought you said you wanted to figure this out, and now you're driving to the middle of nowhere?" I asked. "Alison used to call herself Vivian, as you already know, and that's the only lead we've got, so shut your mouth, _**A**_." She always made it her mission to emphasize that I was A. The bitch need to get over it. "So what do you plan to do with this information?" I sneered. I'm pretty sure she has no idea what she's doing. "We're going to track down CeCe Drake," she replied.

CeCe Drake. Alison's old, older friend. What the hell would she know? But, as requested I sat for the rest of the drive with my mouth shut. It wasn't until we made it to Philly that I said anything. "What's in Philly?" I asked. "Caleb and Toby tracked her down to an apartment here. We're gonna get information, I don't care what it takes." Sighing, I got out of the car, and we made our way up to apartment 4C. _Knock knock_. "Who is it?" We heard a voice yell from inside. It sounded female. Spencer held her finger up to her mouth, to make sure I didn't say anything. "Hello?" the voice shouted again. The clicking of heels made their way to the door. I knocked again. Ever so slightly, the door started to creak open. I pounced onto the girl. "Gotcha, CeCe." I said with a wink.


	5. Chapter 5

"Gotcha, CeCe." I said with a wink.

But, my luck had drawn short. It wasn't CeCe I had tackled, it was Hanna. "What the hell are you doing here, Hanna? Was this a trick?" I turned to Spencer. Neither of them made any move to explain what was going on here. "Spencer, what the fuck is this? I thought we were here to get CeCe, and now Hanna's here? What were you planning?" _Oh shit, I'm still on top of Hanna_, I thought. I had never gotten up faster in my life. I blushed and turned away, embarrassed.

What was even going on here? Spencer had told me we were coming to apprehend CeCe, and instead it's Hanna here. Was this a trap to try and "prove" that I was still A, or something? I was starting to get angry. "SPENCER!" I yelled. "WHAT IS GOING ON?" "We wanted to see if you were A. If you had known CeCe was here, you wouldn't have tackled Hanna when you thought it was CeCe. Congrats, Mona. Hanna and I finally believe you." Spencer said as a scowl crossed her face.

The next day

"Hey, A." Emily said as she walked by me in the school hallway. "Ha ha, very funny, Emily." I said with a grimace as she walked away. I continued to walk toward Mr. Fitz's English class. It was probably my least favorite class. Aria and Ezra gave each other puppy dog stares the entire time, and I just wanted to slap both of them. The sight of Hanna in her dress broke my out of my Ezria hate (for the time being). My eyes widened. She looked fabulous. "Hey, Hanna." I said, as I approached her. "MonA." she said with an emphasized "A". I rolled my eyes. "You know I'm not A!" I pleaded. "But, I'm going to find out, to get this bitch to leave us alone." And I walked away.

Walking away from Hanna was never easy, but I have restrictions ever since my Radley release and if I get locked up again, I certainly won't be able to admire Hanna anymore, or catch Red Coat.

Mr. Fitz's class always smelled like chalk, and the desperation scent he exhumed for Aria. I mean, it was worse when both of their loins were on fire for one another, but Aria had that new boy, Jake, or whatever. Time always went by ever so slowly in this class. Staring at the window to the hallway had always made time seem to go faster. I watched as student after student walked past, and then my eyes were suddenly shocked to see who came next. _Was that Alison? _I thought. I couldn't believe it. Had I just seen Alison, or was I imagining it? No, she was dead, there was no way. "Ummm, Ms. Vanderwaal?" Ezra said. "Yes, Mr. Fitz?" I replied. "Take your seat, please." I hadn't even realized I had stood up. My mind was racing. I couldn't believe my eyes. I sat down and tried to let it sink in, but was interrupted by my phone vibrated.

"Think you know who I am? Guess again, bitches. Nothing is as it seems. Kisses, -A."

My eyes widened. As I looked around the classroom, I saw that Aria, Hanna, Spencer and Emily had gotten the same text. We exchanged glances. What the fuck was going on?


	6. Chapter 6

My eyes widened. As I looked around the classroom, I saw that Aria, Hanna, Spencer and Emily had gotten the same text. We exchanged glances. What the fuck was going on?

But I didn't have long to ponder this text's meaning. Within five seconds, I had gotten up and sprinted out the door. "Alison!" I shouted. I know that was her I saw right before the A text. I kept running and turned the corner. "I know you're here, Alison!" I shouted again. And I kept searching.

I had probably ran around the entire school, and nothing. She had escaped. "Dammit!" I yelled. Winded, I sat down in the girl's locker room. It was the only empty place at this time of day. The girls. They probably thought I was even more suspicious after I ran out like that. Maybe if I told them.. and I pulled out my phone.

"Hey Han. Sorry I ran out like that, I will explain later."

And I pressed send. Again, I opened and read the -A text.

"Think you know who I am? Guess again, bitches. Nothing is as it seems. Kisses, -A."

I thought that it had meant Ali, but what if it was someone else.. No, I know what I saw in the hallway. Alison DiLaurentis is alive, and I'm going to find her.

Finally, I pulled myself up from the ground and decided to go back to class. I walked through the hallway, towards my 5th period class now, I had been in the locker room for a while, but something caught my eye. Two police officers were walking my way. Putting on my best bitch face, I kept walking towards my class. And yet, they creeped closer... and closer. It wasn't until they actually got to me that I realize they were coming for me.

"Ms. Vanderwaal?" the chunkier officer said. "That's me, what's up?" I replied, trying not to show my trembling. "I'm afraid you're going to have to come with us." the lean, tall officer said. "What for?" I asked. But they said nothing. Instead they escorted me to the car, and put me in the back seat. What the hell was going on?

"Where are you taking me?" I replied, scared, after we passed the police station. "You'll see, Ms. Vanderwaal. You'll see." one of the officers said. Suddenly my vision became somewhat blurry. I couldn't mask the panic any longer. "Where are we going?!" I shouted, confused. "Fucking tell me, now!" My rage was rising.

We had probably been driving for 20 minutes, but I didn't know. I was so dazed and infuriated, it could have been less. It wasn't until we stopped that I realized where they were taking me. "No," I whispered. We were at Radley.


End file.
